Two things are super, super hot right now: remakes of ’80s movies and vampires. So what better way for Lindsay Lohan to regain her tragically lost career than by reviving the hokey, nearly unwatchable Nicolas Cage classic Vampire’s Kiss? She could take over for Nic, donning plastic vamp teeth and terrorizing a Maria Conchita Alonso stand-in by jumping on desks, hanging her arms in the air like bat wings, and proclaiming, “I’m a vampire! I’m a vampire!” It’ll be a huge hit. Well, at least compared to the original. And what Lindsay needs most right now is a surefire way to meet really, really low expectations.
You know what? Lindsay posted this pic on Twitter. And we’re on Twitter! That makes us total BFFs, right?
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Yes, Ms. Lohan is a vampire. No, I don’t think she’s sexy with fangs. Yes, I’d like to stake her heart and get it over with. Of course, I’ll do the time because frankly being in prison would be more fun than dealing with that crazy bitch one more minute!
Looks like a scene from a Misty Mundae film…
Well, she does seem to be heading towards batshit crazy so that role would probably be a perfect fit for her.