"EEEE! IT'S LIKE PORN!!!!"

kstew_rpattz.jpgWhat kind of reprehensible scuzzbag would stoop to posting Twilight crap on a celebrity blog in order to attract the 12-year-old demographic? Us! Yesterday at Comic Con 2009, there was a panel for New Moon featuring all the stars of the movie, including Taylor Lautner channeling a Pekingese, hunkasaurus rex Robert Pattinson was channeling Bobby Briggs from Twin Peaks, and Kristen Stewart, who, according to her T-shirt, has better things to do than sit around and fuck her head, hang out with the living dead, snort white shit up her nose, pass out at the shows. And they debuted two exclusive teaser clips from New Moon, which of course were bootlegged and leaked to the internet today. Watch them if you dare, but be sure to wear ear protection for when all the horny tweens in the audience go loco when Lautner and RPattz take of their shirts. We haven't heard female screaming like that since Tab Hunter and Frankie Avalon appeared together onscreen in Operation Bikini!

<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Lyldfq0kQOc&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="425" height="344"></embed>

<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/I_EUZWb9CZw&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="425" height="344"></embed>

Related posts:

Comments

Comments… read them below or add one

bunsbuns July 24, 2009 at 11:44 am

Poor Kristen. She can't keep up, can't keep up, can't keep up. She's out of step with the world.

Reply

CNW Admin July 24, 2009 at 12:16 pm

She's guilty of being white. And sparkly.

Reply

bunsbuns July 24, 2009 at 12:55 pm

But you'll never hear her saying "I've got the straight edge." She loves weeeeeed.

Reply

Bobby Weird July 24, 2009 at 3:05 pm

DC hardcore aside, is she a dracula or a frankenstein?

Reply

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: