Your summer camp experience probably included lots of impromptu booger-eating contests, making macramÈ Kleenex cosies for your mom, and trying to trick the girls into skinny-dipping. At Tom Cruise's kids' summer camp, they learn how to purge their bodies of alien impurities and earn enough money so that giving up sixty percent of your income to further L. Ron's message doesn't seem like a really big deal. Oh, and for those little boys who spend all their time in the crafts lodge bedazzling their scarf collection, there's a special workshop on suppressing your unnatural urges.
Star magazine donned their best Nancy Drew hat and sniffed out the whereabouts of Tom Cruise's older, less paparazzi-attracting, forgotten children:
As Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and their 15-month-old cutie Suri were snapped romping around Berlin in between his filming the World War II drama, Valkyrie, noticeably absent from these family outings were daughter Isabella, 14, and son Connor, 12. Nor were the two with mom Nicole Kidman, who is currently in Australia filming her own WWII epic. So where have the Cruise kids been all summer? Star has learned that the youngsters are in Oregon, at a camp 60 miles south of Portland run by the Church of Scientology! ìThe summer camp is part of the Scientologyís ëget them while theyíre youngí campaign,î a source who attended the camp tells Star. ìWhile they will be enjoying horseback riding, swimming and all kinds of fun activities, some of their day is devoted to Scientology coursework.î
For the sake of family togetherness we hope that Isabella and Connor are learning how to reign in non-believers, so that the next time stepmom Kate returns from a trip to the Barney's shoe department whining, "Why can't my religion be shopping? Posh's is!" they'll know how to touch her on the neck just so while calmly saying, "You're amazing Kate. Wonderful and amazing" until she gets that dazed look in her eyes and heads toward the auditing room repeating, "I'm amazing. I'm amazing. I'm amazing."
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