Weíve just been dying–dying!–to know how the producers of The Simple Life would get around that whole Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie super-bitch feud/wanting to tear off each otherís bobble heads and use them to fatten up Hilary Duff thing. And now we know. Paris and Nicole will separately invade homes and pretend to be the wife. And if the husbands canít resist themselves around a couple of ninety-pound, seventh-grade-educated pseudo-celebrities, then the producers ainít complaining.
For the new season of their oh-so-meaningful and relevant television show, Paris and Nicole will be playing Donna Reed, seeing what itís like to be a wife and mother, supposedly in preparation for their mutual upcoming nuptials. And that sounds quite useful, because spoiled starlets with piles of dough can usually be found in the bathtub with a bottle of Scrubbing Bubbles. But the producers seem to be hoping for a bit more than cooking and cleaning action, as a casting call stated, ìThe friskier the dad, the better.î A source said, ìTheyíre looking for dads who are likely to make a play for Paris or Nicole. Theyíre saying theyíre willing to pay the families ëa substantialí amount of money for two days of shooting and that African American families are a plus.î So weíre guessing the producersí plan goes a little something like this: While Nicole is away her fiancÈ, DJ AM, will be so distraught that heíll stuff his face full of deep-fried Twinkies until he gains back all of his recently shed pounds, then heíll hear about Nicoleís indiscretion with one of her fake hubbies and show up on-set to sit on the adultererís face and smother him to death. Meanwhile Paris will be pretending to be the wifey in a nice African American family and will lose her temper and once again get caught on tape making racial slurs. Sounds terrific! This season will totally win them an Emmy!
And what of Parisís maybe fiancÈ, man Paris? Although itís been rumored that they have split, the pair was spotted on Monday night at Koi in L.A. But lady Paris was also spotted last week with man Parisís countryman Stavros Niarchos, otherwise known as the Jolly Green Giant to Mary-Kate Olsenís Keebler Elf. Weíre hoping that scrawny Mary-Kate will feel the need to save her man from the amateur porn star and will get her fighting gloves on at some Hollywood event, culminating in MK jumping on Parisís back and pulling her hair while Paris tries to swat off the irritating fly she believes is attacking her backside–all in evening gowns and heels, natch.
Paris! And Nicole! At MrSkin.com!
