Kids grow up so fast these days. Just the other day I was watching Urkel covet Laura and cheese on Family Matters, and now he’s being accused of domestic abuse. And sweet Andy from Family Ties has a face full of metal and an arrest record. And remember little Cindy Lou Who from The Grinch? She now smokes cigarettes and is in a relationship with her adjustable speed G-spotter. There’s an interview with Gossip Girl girl Taylor Momsen in the new issue of Disorder magazine, and here’s an excerpt:
“She also grins when asked if she’s single, and replies that she is, that she’s not into guys, waits a beat, then adds she’s not gay but just bored of men and her best friend is her vibrator.”
Now that’s just sad. Sure, you can take your vibrator to the mall and it makes a good wingman, but it never texts back and its love advice is pretty much just noise. Some BFF.
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As long as her vibrator isn’t named Samantha Ronson… I can BUZZZZZ with it!!!
Another teanage idiot playing the whore card to try and get famous. I wonder how long it will be before she starts complaining that no one takes her seriously.
After she stars inn the Courtney Love BioPic… das when!!!
Y’know…I’m getting mighty tired of these idiot tweens trying to follow in Lindsay Lohan’s path of short-term success and long-term self-destruction. The next one that takes the fall (and it’ll probably be this one), I’ll leave to the serial killer who thinks he’s saving fallen women’s souls by slicing them up into cat food. I’m all used up.
listen up: AN ARTIST WHO IS SMOKING ISN’T A REAL ARTIST!!