We'd pretty much forgotten about the existence of Brooke Shields, and it seems that she doesn't like people forgetting about her. So she had to go and gross us out. Seriously, this is worse than anything Joe Simpson has ever said or done. Unless his nocturnal feeding on the intestines of goats just hasn't been uncovered yet.
When your average suburban mom is out lunching with hubby and baby and she smells something funny she knows it's time to make haste to the baby-changing station in the ladies' room, where she will take care of her tot's stinky bum and wash up before returning to her meal. Not Brooke Shields. She doesn't need no stinkin' baby-changing station when there's a perfectly good table right in front of her. That's right, folks, Pretty Baby changed her little one right on the table that she had just eaten off of. And then she ordered dessert. That information is gross enough without the persistent thought running through our mind: Did she at least head to the ladies' to wash her hands after handling the poopy diaper? Observing that the evidence points to no just made us throw up a little in our mouth. We may never eat again.
Suddenly Susan Not the Only Shitty Thing in Brooke's Life
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