If your heart is breaking over the thought of Paris Hilton (she's American royalty, you know!) retiring from the spotlight to don aprons and become a forge for infants, fear not! She may not be getting married anytime in the near future after all. A Paris Hilton and a Lindsay Lohan story . . . in the same day? It's like March 2005 all over again.
According to various false tabloids, Paris squared want to get married immediately, they are dying for babies, the Latsis family adores their future daughter-in-law. Not true, says Latsis's dad, Grigoris Kasidokostas: "All of it is lies." Lies! Apparently, Hilton's infamous sex tape just hit the shelves in Greece, and the Latsis camp are not amused. Kasidokostas takes umbrage with reports that claim he wanted grandchildren immediately. "Every father wants grandchildren but only under the right circumstances," he explained. When he was told that Kathy Hilton bragged that her family would be traveling to meet the Latsiseseseses, he bristled, "That was the first I'd heard of it. I've never met her mother." Last but not least, Kasidokostas fulfills every young man's worst nightmare and waxes poetic on the sexual inexperience of his son in print: "[Paris is] a very, very good boy . . . a gentle, down-to-earth boy . . . not a playboy by any stretch of the imagination. He doesn't have a lot of experience with women." And that's quite the pretty maraschino on top of this delicious shit sandwich.
Paris bares! Nudes galore at MrSkin.com.
Sorry, Paris, Your Future Father-In-Law's Just Not That Into You
Previous post: The Lies of Hazzard
