Hey, Sienna Miller! You want the media to leave you alone and stop following you around with cameras all the time and invading your privacy? Then stop fucking making out with notoriously slutty models in hotel lobbies. Hiding your clandestine affairs is much easier when you check into the Howard Johnson's off Route 9 like the rest of us.
The New York Daily News's Ben Widdicombe, the wittiest of the "reputable" gossips, reports:
One explanation for Britain's surging population is that cold weather makes them horny. It might also explain the very public hookup between Sienna Miller and English musician-slash-model Jamie Burke on a chilly Saturday night.The lanky Mr. Burke, who is currently modeling for Calvin Klein, counts Kate Moss and Lindsay Lohan among his previous paramours. He also attended a party for Miss Miller at the Gramercy Park Hotel after a Cinema Society screening of her latest film, "Factory Girl."
And it was in the same hotel's lobby that the two were spotted locking lips around 8 p.m. Saturday.
"There was no Fashion Week party or anything there at the time – they were just making out," says a spy.
In addition to ex-fiance Jude Law, Miller has been linked to former co-stars including Daniel Craig and heterosexual actor Hayden Christensen. She and Burke have collected so many celebrity saliva samples between them you could probably clone half of Hollywood from their toothbrushes.
We think we've figured out Sienna Miller. It's not that she actually dates anyone. She just strategically places herself in the vicinity of people of some level of renown (although a Calvin Klien model is stretching it) and when she sees a paparazzo or a Daily News staffer or even a gossipy tourist with a camera phone, she stuffs her tongue down the celeb's throat. Then she screams about how she never wanted to be famous, she's just dedicated to her craft, etc. Then she removes her ankle boot, shines it up on her tights-as-pants, and hurls it at the camera in an oh-so-dignified manner. Well, golly, she sure has convinced us that she's a serious actress.
Serious actress Sienna shows her serious boobs at MrSkin.com.
