When you see the headline "Blogger Attacked By Member of Black Eyed Peas", you may assume that your good pals at CNW got pissed upon by Fergie. Good guess, but wrong. As much as it pains us to write a story about fame-ravenous bloat-bag Perez Hilton, this is too goofy to ignore. Dude claims that last night, will.i.am beat the tar out of him after the Much Music Awards in Canada. TMZ says:
Celebrity blogger Perez Hilton is accusing Black Eyed Peas frontman Will.I.Am of assault — but we've learned cops have targeted someone else.
But cops in Toronto tell us it was the general manager of the Black Eyed Peas — Polo Molina — who is under investigation and he turned himself in to police early this morning.
It is worth noting that after this alleged brutal assault rendering Hilton bloody and injured, he called 911 immediately. Haha, just joshing you. He Twittered it.
– I'm in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please.about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– Still waiting for the police. The bleeding has stopped. I need to document this. Please, can the police come to the SoHo Met Hotel. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– I spoke to my lawyer. I really need to talk to the authorities. Please come to the SoHo Met Hotel. Have called the police. Need them here. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– The Toronto police are here now. Thank you. Please stop calling them. — about 5 hours ago from Sidekick
– Thank u all from the bottom of my heart for ur concern. The police are investigating the assault now. I did the right thing by reporting it. — about 3 hours ago from web
It's awesome that technology has advanced so much that the youth of America now has no idea how to pick up a phone and call the police or an ambulance. Go steal a 20-year-old's wallet and he'll frantically Tweet it, write on Tumblr about it, make a Facebook quiz about it, and then get pissed off that the cops didn't file a report because they don't subscribe to his RSS feed.
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if Perez (Mario) got any kind of beat down, then i think most people would admit that he had it coming