Despite what your uproarious novelty T-shirt might claim, you are not a licensed bikini inspector. Sadly, such a position does not exist, although it seems one might have a shot at becoming a Paris Hilton boob wrangler.
A blonde girl falling over drunk with a man’s hands groping her breasts . . . and it’s not Tara Reid? Unfathomable! That’s your pal Paris, taking a lushy little spill last night in Hollywood.
While Nicky pulls a Nelson Muntz, it’s up to P-Hizzy’s bodyguard to help her up. Or maybe he’s not a bodyguard–maybe she’s one-upping Mariah Carey and has hired a titty-minder to keep nip slips at bay. Or maybe he’s just some repulsive pervert who happened to fall hands-first into Paris Hilton’s boobs. Why are you laughing? It happens to us nearly every day.
It’s been a while. For old time’s sake, check naked Paris at MrSkin.com.
