We usually like our celebrity bladder-control-issue stories to be accompanied by photos, but when that story involves Paris Hilton leaving a puddle of urine in a cab without even noticing, our imagination can be just as good.
Breakingnews.ie reports:
“Harden Jamison tells American tabloid National Enquirer the hotel heiress and Simple Life star was too drunk to notice she’d wet herself when he picked her and boyfriend Stavros Niarchos up after a party on Maui. The disgusted cab driver claims he mopped up the mess with a towel and plans to use Hilton’s own DNA as evidence against her.”
So this is how things went down: Paris was kicking it in Hawaii, taking time off from . . . work? Er, no. School? Nope, not that either. Humanitarian endeavors? That doesn’t sound right. So she was just kicking it. Hanging out in a bikini with her sister and uncontrollably scratching her pubic lice. And one night she grabbed Stamos Nachos and hit the town. After a few too many watermelon jello shots and a fun-filled evening of dancing on tables and rubbing her degenerate genitals on everything in sight, animal, mineral, or vegetable, Paris grabbed her Nachos and headed for a cab. We assume that they made out in the back of the taxi, and while Paris was licking Stamos’s face her over-full bladder released itself all over the upholstery. Paris interpreted the warm sensation as that thing she’d heard about called love. Or maybe the pair attended a Black Eyed Peas concert that night and Paris got inspired.
