Pamela Anderson Presents Mr. and Mrs. Barkington

If weíve learned anything in our squandered little life itís that Canadians are weird. For one thing they perpetually dress as if it were 1995. But they have given us many precious gifts. Fuck the French and their Statue of Liberty; the Canadians gave us Bryan Adams and Jason Priestley. They also gave us Pamela Anderson (although her larger-than-life hooters are purely American made). Now Pamela Anderson has given us the gift of canine marriage.

There has been much talk recently suggesting that Pammy and her ex-husband, college charity case Tommy Lee, were going to re-re-tie the knot. But perhaps all those hot gossips misunderstood the nuptial news. It was actually Pamís dogs, golden retriever Star and Chihuahua Luca, who were exchanging rings (or do they just give each other their slobber-covered chew toys?). Seriously, Pam, a doggy wedding? Is your life really that boring that you must entertain yourself with such nonsense? Did you see Star licking Lucaís ass and feel guilty and think they needed a committed relationship before they went that far (and, really, weíre shocked youíre such a prude.)? Because if thatís the case then we better get to work planning a wedding between our black lab and our leg, cause that bastard humps the hell out of our appendage every damn day. We wouldnít want the neighbors thinking he was some kind of slut.

See Pam's other puppies at MrSkin.com.

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