“Hello. My name is Megan Fox. You may know me from such movies as Transformers and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. If you haven’t seen those (or even if you have), you’ve probably beat off to pictures of me on the internet. I hear most guys do that these days. It’s because of this very intimate connection that we have that I feel it is acceptable to tell you way too much about myself. Sometimes I talk about how much a love weeeeeed, sometimes I compare myself to hookers. But today I’m going to tell you about my profound mental issues. Seriously, I’m all sorts of fucked up. I told Wonderland magazine:
I basically read every book ever written about Marilyn Monroe. I could end up like that because I constantly struggle with the idea that I think I’m a borderline personality – or that I have bouts of mild schizophrenia. I definitely have some kind of mental problem and I haven’t pinpointed what it is.
Now, you may be thinking, ‘Gee, Megan, isn’t there a little piece of yourself that you want to keep private? Isn’t that a little too personal to share with the public?’ And while I appreciate your concern for my privacy, I don’t think you understand. I am a movie star. And to be a real movie star I need to appear to be as different from you as possible. Sure, my incredibly gorgeous face and hot body help, but I need a hook, something to make people say, ‘She’s got it, man, the whole package.’ Plus, if people think I’m mentally unstable they’ll be afraid of me and I can get anything I want.”
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Who’s the psycho bitch now, Megan?
Oh, brother. Can it get any freakier? (Maybe we shouldn’t ask. The next surprise might involve Ms. Monroe’s dress from THE SEVEN YEAR ITCH.)
Only if Stupidity is a mental illness.
@ WeirdArchives:
The thought of Fox mimicking Monroe’s famous scene in her career makes me gag. Fox doesn’t have the looks or the figure Monroe had, and she’s totally skankified.