Like a prodigal daughter, Lindsay Lohan has returned to the warm, nurturing bosom of Partying, her most cherished and only reliable parent, jetting to Las Vegas this weekend to spend the wee hours dancing down at Pure. You, like the rest of us, are cynical buttholes and probably just immediately rolled your eyes and made the "drinky-drinky" motion with your hand but guess what? Ho is wearing an alcohol monitoring ankle bracelet (just like Michelle Rodriguez and Tracy Morgan!) and was seen drinking nothing but Red Bull all night. We don't need to point out that alcohol monitoring ankle bracelets don't detect anything other than alcohol, though, and instead of her usual band of merry hipster doofuses and A-listers with whom she parties, Lohan was seen in the company of various sundry Pussycat Dolls and she left the club with Criss Angel. Far be it from us to suggest that one would have to be all zorked out on eightballs to party with J-list female impersonators and bang a magician, but hey. Maybe Angel promised he could make her ankle bracelet . . . dissssappppear!
Page Six reports:
Newly sober Lindsay Lohan is afraid that nude photos taken of her by British bad boy Calum Best have been stolen by a computer hacker and will wind up on the Internet.
Just weeks after sultry shots of Lohan and Vanessa Minnillo goofing around with kitchen knives hit the Web, underground site celebslam.com claims it has its hands on nude photos of Lindsay – and the stalker-ish site is threatening to publish them.
In what Web site owner "Nick" claims to be a G-mail chat between himself and Lohan, the starlet supposedly wrote: "All I know is that someone broke into my computer and left a file on my desktop saying he got the pictures Cal took from me naked."
Regarding the photos, Lohan's rep, Leslie Sloane Zelnick, told Page Six, "Anything is possible. I know nothing about it, but her lawyers have been contacted."
The much put-upon Leslie Sloane Zelnick, she is our god. Most publicists aim to make their clients look like angels, but at this point, LSZ is like, "Nude pics? Hell, anything is possible. Lindsay clubbing seals? Sure, could be. Having poop sex with Carol Channing? Entirely probable, let me check into it."
Yes, of course Lindsay Lohan is at MrSkin.com.
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