Today we return from our week off, and while much of our vacation was spent trying to explain the meaning of Fergalicious to our grandma, the rest of our time was spent much like a typical night in the life of Lindsay Lohan: getting lap dances from strippers.
When Lindsay called all strippers whores, she didn't mean the ones at Scores; they're hot and classy. But those fat bitches at Bob's House of Hairy Poon in Santa Monica, they'll sleep with anybody. Page Six reports:
LINDSAY Lohan got down and dirty at Scores West for three hours early yesterday – jumping onstage to do a wild bump-and-grind, then ushering topless dancers into the bathroom to apologize for recently calling them all "whores.""I love strippers," the 20-year-old actress gushed as she entered the famed mammary mecca at 12:30 a.m., and launched into a half-hour deejay shift during the club's "Turntable Tuesdays."
Next, "She got up on the stripper pole and began to dance with the Scores Girls with 400 customers cheering her on," said our source. "Then, she joined her entourage of 15 in the VIP area, and got lap dances from many of the girls, including a special double-dance from two strippers at once.
"It was hot. But while everybody was drinking, Lindsay was not. It was strictly Perrier for her."
We find it really hard to believe that with an audience of 400 people not one of them possessed a contraband cell-phone camera with which to document Lohan Stripper Mania. After all, isn't that why cell-phone cameras were invented? Are we going to have to wait until someone invents some James Bond shit like a camera that is implanted in your eye and records every second of your vision (and is completely free from detection by Moose, the Scores bouncer) before we are able to witness firsthand the accomplished pole work of Miss Lindsay?
Lindsay, working the cleavage not the pole, at MrSkin.com.
