Kristen Stewart Marked for Death

robsten_kiss_1Kristen Stewart smokes weed, runs around in 97 degree weather in leather, and does her own stunts, but none of these activities are as health-threatening is the one she engaged in last night at a Kings of Leon concert in Vancouver. Which is getting within two inches of Twilight costar Rob Pattinson. When the Twi-teens see this picture, they’re going to go all Lord of the Flies on her ass and chant “Kill the pig! Spill its blood!” before skewering her Joan Jett head on a stake. IMDb is all,

Twilight co-stars Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have fuelled rumours they’re dating in secret – after they were snapped kissing at a concert in Canada.

A crafty fan grabbed a snap of the pair smooching in the audience at a Kings of Leon gig in Vancouver on Saturday night.

Call us socially awkward virgins, but we’re pretty sure lips have to actually be touching something for it to be a kiss. Though people are pointing to the last photo as proof that these two totally sucked face, we’re calling foul unless Kristen’s lips are located on her shoulder. Or unless Kristen is reaching over to run her hands through Rpattz’s hair, thus transferring the oily viscosity that allows it to stand up at will onto her hands for moisturization. We hear it’s also good for surfboard wax, denture cream, mucilage, ball joint lube, and soapmaking.

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WeirdArchives August 17, 2009 at 10:51 am

Oh, who the Hell cares? After the little actress switch controversy, Ms. Stewart can go rob a liquor store and no one would give a frag. I’ve over the TWILIGHT saga since the paperbacks. How about some Asimov’s FOUNDATION, for Christ’s sake? Make up for I, ROBOT and what. I’ve just about had it with the photogenic undead.

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Agent E. August 17, 2009 at 11:23 am

Somehow I don’t think Asimov is every going to be a huge hit with the tweeners.

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WeirdArchives August 17, 2009 at 12:21 pm

Considering what’s on the pipeline now, Asimov could be better than remaking FRIDAY THE 13TH for the nineteenth time. (Unless it involves Muppets, then it’s remaking MEET THE FEEBLES.)

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Inspector S. (CNW Admin) August 17, 2009 at 2:06 pm

“Robert Pattinson IS Norby, The Mixed-Up Robot.”

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Matt C August 18, 2009 at 8:20 pm

Nasty. Stewart and Pattinson have seen better days. And by “better days,” I mean pre-Twilight when Stewart didn’t look butch and Pattinson looked healthy.

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TruthTeller August 21, 2009 at 11:28 am

I think Rob does not like to shave and looks scruffy because he puts so much gel and mousse in his hair since they told him his head was too flat. He always looks clean cut and nice.

Kristen is the one that has changed the most in her looks. I think she got dumped by Michael because he was sick of the love gleams she gave Rob. Rob was just nice to her — he said that he was not sure whether he faked the chemistry that he was shocked over her getting the part and that she is tough, angry and intimidating. I think Kristen looks bad NOT like a girl in a new love relationship. Look at the link to see what I mean.

He has been kind to her while she has over and over again LUSTED FOR HIM. Rob said he could fall for her but in Bliss UK magazine in February said he has never been in love. He is a smart guy and professional he won’t get tangled up with her but he will have to stay friendly as even Rachelle LeFevre said they bickered a lot. Probably because Rob has been raised by conservative traditional Catholics and Kristen has been raised by hippies.

I want to see more of Rob and wish that he has a long career…getting involved deeply with this troubled girl is bad for his reputation and future career.

Kristen ruined her own career already ALL BY HERSELF by being crazy enough to smoke a pipe in broad daylight, curse 5 times in the Entertainment Weekly current issue, talk about Taylor’s testicles and curse during press meets at Comic Con.

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Romantic Fool August 21, 2009 at 11:34 am

It was not just cursing, it was the f bomb in EW magazine…REPEATEDLY and she beat up Taylor and talked about his cohonas. She puts off more anger and toughness than most men do. No wonder Rob said to a DJ radio show guy that she looks like she could beat him up. Most guys like confident, self-assured, nice, non-combative girls that are the type you bring home to mom. Kristen comes off insecure, strange and like a rough punk. He could have anyone…he should not settle for this low class rude girl.

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Ari. July 20, 2010 at 3:09 pm

Wow. Some people are really pathetic. Alright, Kristen comes off as a tough girl, but that doesn’t mean she’s just a complete bitch that has no feelings. She curses…so what? I curse like a sailor, but since she’s a celebrity, she can’t be herself and curse? That’s BULLSHIT. She was joking about the Taylor Lautner thing in EW, and she didn’t actually beat him up, if you had watched the video and got your facts straight before making a comment about it, you would know that they were play-wrestling because the photographer told them to. My opinion is that some people are jealous and envy her because she is such an amazing actress and person. Jesus. Get a fucking life and stop trying to comment on other’s, will ya? Thanks. (:

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