Khloe Kardashian Says TSA Screenings Are Like Rape

You’d think that a woman who cared enough to rub Miracle Whip into her p-lips so they might “shine like the top of the Chrysler building” would be very invested in showing off her hard work at any opportunity. Otherwise it’s like wearing diamonds on the soles of one’s shoes. But giantess Khloe Kardashian does not agree, and went on George Lopez to promote… I don’t know, herself I guess, and ended up likening airport screenings to rape, which is always a really great and totally non-controversial thing to say. A quote:

“They basically are just raping you in public… The people are so aggressive. It’s like, ‘Chill out, you didn’t find anything on me yet, calm down…’ They say, ‘OK, I’m going to be patting you down and I’m going to be touching the crease of your ass.’”

I’m sure rape victims would totally agree. Hey guys, remember that time you were raped? Wasn’t it exactly like the time Khloe Kardashian was forced to take her laptop out of its case at LAX? I hope poor Khloe finds a good therapist to help make her whole again. Whatever, she’s just pissed that the scans pick up her assplants.