Jessica Simpson is rounding up 50,000 pairs of shoes to send to Haiti, because when your entire extended family has been brutally crushed to death in an earthquake, nothing lifts your spirits like a kitten heel, amirite ladies? (The Blemish)- Adrian Pasdar arrested for speeding and possible DUI. Oh no! Poor Adrian Pasdar! What will become of Adrian Pasdar? Wait, who’s Adrian Pasdar? (PopEater)
- The new version of Heidi Montag will pose for Playboy. Non-nude. Gee, that’s hot. (Nudography)
- Michelle Tractenberg is some sort of super sexy Jewish superhero lady in the new Complex. (Amy Grindhouse)
- Get ready for leaked nudes from Jersey Shore star JWoww. Does she shave her Snooki? Because that would really be a Situation. (Yeeeah!)
- Apparently, Ben Affleck is drinking again. We’d drink too if we were Ben Affleck. (Celebitchy)
- Tila Tequila reveals a sonogram of her “pregnancy”. What do you think she’s really pregnant with, because it sure as shit isn’t a baby. (Pop on the Pop)
- Kevin Federline doesn’t hate life because he’s fat; he’s fat because he hates life. (Allie Is Wired)
- Puffy Dingle Diddy P. Doggy Daddy Doo buys his 16-year-old son a $360K car. I can relate, because when I was 16, my dad bought me a $500 Dodge Omni that wouldn’t go uphill. I’m spoiled! (Celebrific)
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Montag doing the ‘naked’ again? Haven’t we suffered enough? How about we have her in a burkha without eye holes? That would be worth the six dollar cover price.