Our dream story would go like this: a star is walking down the street when an anvil falls from above, hitting them on the head. The force causes their colostomy bag to go rogue, it falls out of the bottom of their pants, they slip on it and fall down a manhole. We’ve come to grips with the fact that this scenario will probably never happen, so here’s a close second.
A source tells US Weekly that Jessica Simpson had a, ahem, windy moment during a business meeting for her denim line in late January. “While one of the executives was speaking in a room full of five people, Jessica let out a very loud fart,” says the insider.
“Her mother was there, and it prompted her to turn around and yell, ‘Jessica!’ The tension was extreme. No one knew what to say.”
Business executives often find themselves having to adopt the customs of other cultures to seal the deal. Hopefully they realized that Jessica’s cheese-cutting was just an ancient Texan custom signifying friendship and followed toot. Suit. Whatevs.
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Speaking sa one who done do live in Houston Texas… it was indeed! The passing of gas between people is a cause for bonding and friendship… YEARS AGO before Dubya was president or even governor of the great Republic of Texas… I met him leaving an elevator in the Transco Tower… He turned and looked at me as the doors closed. I could NOT figure out why he laughed… could not figure it out for about 10 seconds… That boy must have had rotten skunkweed for lunch!!! His elevator surprise was shared a few floors later when two hot secretaries got on… I tried to warn them… They turned to me after the doors closed and gave me the stink eye… how do you explain that a guy that looked a little like President George Bush (ne Reagan) left the assbomb???
Getting telt by mummy in front of all those execs. Possibly more embarrassing than dropping a gut…
So the heck what that she farted. Farting is a normal function of life. I can’t understand for the life of me as to why people demonize normal body functions.
As for her mother, her mother seriously needs to lighten up. If the businessmen/manufacturer doesn’t want to manufacture Jessica’s pants designs just because she farted, well then obviously they all have some mental/psychological issues that they need to deal with.
There are more important things that should be criticized instead of demonizing a normal function. No wonder why society in this day and age is totally screwed up.
a women’s gastromonicials is the ultimate afrodesiac
a women’s gastronomicals is the ultimate afrodiasiac
i luv it fart on my face baby