Hey, you know what, guys? Jenna Jameson took out her breast implants. If you're anything like us, you're thinking, "Wow, that's weird. We didn't even notice." And then you'll sit and think for a minute and it will dawn on you that when a normal human loses the body-weight equivalent of Shiloh Jolie-Pitt in the span of six months, of course their boobies get smaller. It's just natural. Which is a word that has never really applied to Jenna. She says of her decision to ditch the plastic palookas:
When I had implants, I felt uncomfortable. I would be shy at the beach. I know it sounds funny, but Iíd wear high-necked clothes ñ unless I was at an adult-film convention. So I thought, Why donít I be who I am and get my real ones back? . . . Even for women with naturally large boobs, getting a reduction is so freeing. I feel like I can stand up straighter . . . before, when I jogged, I had to hold my boobs. I looked like I was molesting myself! . . . The first thing I did when I got home was open my bra. I wasnít supposed to but I did. I was so happy, I cried. It was like looking into the mirror when I was 17.
Jenna also claims that she's quitting porn forever (because, hey, if Paris Hilton can parlay fucking-on-film fame into getting paid half a mil to sit in the VIP booth at a club and wave at tourists from Duluth every fifteen minutes, why can't Jenna?) and she's considering every blonde and sometimes blonde in Hollywood to dive into her life story in a planned biopic.
I would love Scarlett Johansson to play me. I think Rachel McAdams is amazing, and Sienna Miller.
We're guessing that when it comes casting time, the leading lady's rÈsumÈ will have a bit more "Stripper #2–The Sopranos" than "made people remember Woody Allen is more than a gross old perv, he makes really good movies too."
But back to these implants. What exactly did she do with them? Are they framed and perched atop her mantle next to all those AVN awards? Is she going to sell them on eBay like Jordan to fund her post-porn life? Are they going to start a whole new niche in the porn world as the stars of Silicome on Jenna's Tits?
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I like Jenna as a celeb but she needs to ditch this biopic thing. Scarlett has shown no interest, and I doubt Miller or McAdams would want to play a porn star.
Jenna is going to learn, just like Pamela Anderson, that her "front" was not the thing that was holding her back. Now that she is another emaciated form sex symbol with an average figure she may not see all the doors open to her that she thinks. (tell me Jenna, do you think that all those guy wanted to know your opinion of hot topics of the day?)
What Jenna will find now is what everyone has always known. Unless she's boinking someone on or off screen, she's just another blonde stripper on Prozac.
Thats ok, hubby has $, she'll find another lonely writer to talk to and "author" another book. Thank God for spell checker.
Yuk…..