D'Onofrio Struck with the Dreaded "Exhaustion"

In recent weeks, Vincent D'Onofrio fainted twice on the set of his show, Law And Order: Criminal Intent. After numerous tests, the diagnosis is "exhaustion," the fictional yet deadly disease that only seems to prey on celebrities. This comes hot on the heels of a recent Hollywood epidemic of stars being struck down with "grippe" and "the vapors". Special leeches are being flown in from overseas for a good Tinseltown bloodletting.

D'Onofrio was hospitalized recently after rehearsing a strenuous climbing scene for his hit show, which caused him to swoon like a Victorian lady. He was discharged after two days, but unfortunately, fainted again at home on Monday. He returned to the hospital for further observation and testing, which did not reveal any health problems beyond exhaustion, according to Pam Ruben Golum, the spokeswoman for Criminal Intent. D'Onofrio is resting at home in New York and was expected to return to work next week. Historically, "exhaustion" usually translates to "crazy", "drug addict", or "eating disorder", but we're willing to give D'Onofrio the benefit of the doubt and wish him a speedy recovery.

Tagged as: television, Vincent D'Onofrio