Jessica Simpson Gets Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity

jessicasimpbabyjane.jpgJessica Simpson is rumored to be in talks to star in an upcoming film in which she will play a woman who joins the Marines. Will she be a hard, studly G.I. Jane, or a delightfully dingy Private Benjamin? Who's to say, but one thing we know–she'll do it farting. Jessica told Extra about the diet regimen she's employing to get into shape for the role:

"I am going to be all ripped. But it's tough, I'm not good on sugar. Or dairy – you'll hear it come out of all ends!"

There she is, ladies and gentleman. The sex symbol of our time. Softly pouting, quivering lips, a natural bustline like the pillow of Jesus, a come-hither flirty wink, and billowing noxious odors trumpeting from her anus. We were just saying the other day how much we miss Jenny McCarthy.

Chestica shows off at MrSkin.com.

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