ï They try to make me wear a tee-shirt, I said, no, no, no. (Egotastic!)
ï They tried to make Jonathan go to Rhyshab, he said, no, no, n–well, okay. (Female First)
ï John Krasinski from The Office and RenÈe Zellweger? OK, that sounds fine, carry on. (I'm Not Obsessed)
ï Scarlett Johansson's handsome jumblies are SNL's new Hans and Franz. Because they'll pump (clap) you up. (Hollywood Tuna)
ï Scary Spice's daughter is not named Fortuna, as previously reported. She's Angel Iris Murphy Brown. Because everybody loves Candice Bergen! (D Listed)
ï Morgan Fairchild: she's still got (t)it! (Drunken Stepfather)
ï Some rich Russian guy wants to pay Jennifer Lopez $2 million dollars to sing at a party. Little does he know that stateside, a J. Lo warbling usually goes for around $36.99 and a half a pack of Fruit Stripe. (IDontLikeYouInThatWay)
ï It's been a few weeks since we've dipped our chalice into the lusty lake that is Jessica Biel's rotund squatter. Let's do. (Yeeeah!)
ï Speaking of asses, here's Nicky Hilton's. She does not share her sister's unfortunate goiteresque gluteal growth. (Taxi Driver)
ï Hilary Duff strokes a thick, wrinkled, fleshy tube. (Popoholic)
ï Suri Cruise hits the party circuit. (Bricks and Stones)