- Tom Cruise is an old-fashioned kinda guy, and recently sat down with the parents of his paid platonic consort to hash out contract wedding details.
- Robert Redford: From lumpy to hunky in five short years! Twelve fab secrets for a comely mug inside!
- Madonna stuffs her bra!
- Clay Aiken is terrifying in a way that's, frankly, kind of mesmerizing.
- That's it, we're giving up on the TomKat jokes. There's no way we can beat Goldenfiddle at that game. We ain't even gonna try.
