Paris Hilton is apparently feeling fairly peevish towards Elijah Blue Allman, the offspring of Gregg Allmann and Cher. Last week he went on Howard Stern and admitted that, years ago, he porked our favorite cockeyed trollop and, as the sex was of the unprotected variety, he scrubbed his penis with Tilex afterwards. Sadly, the household cleaner did not protect Allman from contracting a cornucopia of venereal diseases, but we're told that he finally got that stubborn mildew out of his weiner grout.
We totally missed this gem of a story last week. Surely you understand why a story about the frontman of Deadsy happened to slip under our radar. The tale smells a bit like a year ago, when Tom Sizemore (where has he been lately? Off in a corner, nursing an everlasting boner?) bragged about banging Paris, inspiring ire. But unlike the Sizemore rumor, Paris isn't denying the copulation. Cityrag says:
Elijah proceeded to call Paris ìa sweet girlî while also claiming he wasnít that interested in her, especially after they had sex. Elijah next said, because he and Paris didnít use protection when they were together, he ended up using Tilex to clean himself off when they were done in order to avoid contracting any possible diseases from her. Elijah also acknowledged he was with Nicole Richie.
We have to wonder if Nicole is gloating just a tiny bit today. Sure, she partook of Paris's sloppy seconds. But we can infer from the quote that Elijah probably did not have to resort to raiding Nicole's under-sink cabinet for bleach-based cleansers with which to protect him from crotch vermin. Small victories.
Safely look at naked Paris at MrSkin.com . . . no Tilex needed.
