It’s election day here in Illinois, so we’re going to take a moment to tell you about the horrors that could befall the world if everyone in America actually showed up at the polls. What if America set up an American Idol-like system where voters could just make a phone call to cast their vote? You know what would happen? Bret Michaels would be our president. And according to him, he’d be, like, good at it and shit. He told PopEater:
I have a shirt ‘Bret Michaels for President.’ I’d be good. When I am drinking beer at the bar I have all the worlds problems solved. I have figured out how to solve every problem in the world when I’m at the bar.
Let us guess. Every solution involves a gaggle of strippers willing to slurp on schlong if they get on TV and a few cases of Southern Comfort?
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Actually that would be my solution as well… stripper/hooker blowjobs for everybody!!!
i wish he could could figure out a solution to rid us of him.
I would just love to take a good look underneath that stupid fucking hat of his! … BALDY
He first needs to solve his no-hair problem.