OK, here's the thing. Brad Pitt already had his midlife crisis, right? He divorced his nice, boring wife and ran off with a hussy from work. While wearing leather and riding a motorcycle. Pretty typical. Over. Done. He can't do it again. But according to Star magazine, he's trying to diddle the nanny. What's next? Will we see his toupee blow off while he's whistling at college girls from his red convertible? Come on.
At the Oscars they looked like the picture of perfection, but days later Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie had their nastiest blowup yet ó which ended with a stinging slap and Brad racing away on his motorcycle.In the March 23 issue of Star ó on sale now! ó we exclusively report that Angelina flew into a jealous rage when she walked past the open bedroom door of 8-month-old twins, Knox and Vivienne ó and didn't like what she saw!.
And it's not surprising, for Brad was on the bed, rubbing the back of a pretty young nanny! Angie got so mad she slapped Brad and fired the girl on the spot!
"She completely flipped out," says the insider. "She got right in Brad's face, screaming at the top of her lungs, and told the nanny to get out of her house and never come back!"
The explosive argument woke up the sleeping twins, who began to cry. As Brad tried to console both the twins and the nanny, Angie just snapped ó and slapped! ó hitting him right across the face.
"He was stunned," reveals the insider.
We neveróEVERóbelieve anything written about Brad and Angie. Magazines want to make them out to be normal human beingsótheir house is a mess, the kids eat junk food, they fight about boring shit like bills and playdatesóbut they're not. They're some other species entirely. Their children are born instinctively able to speak every language known to humans. If they do fight, it's over which multi-million-dollar estate to purchaseóshe likes the one with the conservatory, because Shiloh really should master the entire Mozart catalog by age five, but he likes the one with the traditional English gardens because Pax really has a gift for botany. And they probably have sex by entwining a few strands of their expertly coiffed tresses and sharing each other's inner spirits.
Comments