Anna Nicole and Howard K.'s Totally Legitimate Love, Illustrated

We struggled with these pictures of Anna Nicole Smith and attorney/possible sperm doner/definite creep Howard K. Stern pledging their love and devotion in a "commitment ceremony". Lord knows our struggle. Don't post the pictures out of respect for a grieving mother, or post them cuz they're disturbing and hilarious? In the end, the fact that ANS basically had them taken so she could sell them to the highest bidder, coupled with the 1950s Barbie lashes, was the deciding factor.

anna_nicole_smith1.jpg

Anna Nicole dons a beautiful wedding gown left over from the 1986 "Brides on Ice!" Ice Capades touring show:

anna_nicole_smith2.jpg
After the ceremony, she and new spiritual life partner Howard K. take a totally spontaneous and not-at-all-forced, very carefree and happy dip in the ocean. "Wh-where's my panties?" Anna slurred, looking around. "Sugarpie? 'djyou eat Mommy's undies?":

anna_nicole_smith4.jpg
Howard K. leans in for a kiss. Anna tries not to dry heave, and happily notes that she's still donning the "Free Shots All Night!" wristband she got at Joe's Tiki Shack after lifting her shirt the night before:

anna_nicole_smith6.jpg
The couple reportedly feasted on Kentucky Fried Chicken after the ceremony. It appears that, overcome with the excitement and merry-making of the day's festivities, Howard bucked the usual wedding tradition of smashing cake into one's new spouse's mouth, and just repeatedly smacked Anna in the face with a drumstick, extra crispy:

anna_nicole_smith9.jpg

Anna Nicole, in happier and nakeder days, at MrSkin.com.

Previous post:

Next post: