Lindsay Lohan is arguably the most sought-after broad in the country right now. She's photographed everywhere she goes, she has a different high-profile dude on her arm every week, she starred in a well-received film alongside Meryl Streep, she parties with Kate Moss, she's appearing in high-profile magazine spreads sporting things like $3500 suspenders and $8000 wimples and other couture items of the like. Now what would you expect a person in Lindsay's position to do next, career-wise? Appear in a Miu Miu campaign? Work with a respected director on a gritty film for a reduced paycheck in hopes of an Oscar? Start a clothing line? No. The answer, dear reader: zit cream infomercials.
Lindsay joins such luminaries as Jessica Simpson, Alicia Keys, and Diddy after signing a contract to peddle Proactiv, high-priced Oxy-style products for the lumpy of face. Lohan will reportedly earn $2 million for her series of commericals, which might sound like a fair amount of cheddar, but it's a slap in the pimply face when you learn that Diddy earned $3 million. Still, $2 mil does buy a lot of leggings, and America's booziest sweetheart reportedly says, in her spot (hee!):
My skin, thanks to Proactiv, is clear all the time. Proactiv heals acne, but the best thing is that it's super gentle, so it works every day like skin care. That's how I use it, and it works.
The funny thing is that Lindsay has been a high-profile celebrity since the age of twelve. We have seen her go through puberty. We have seen her sprout jugs. She is photographed daily. And we have never, ever seen her with even one miniscule zit adorning her mug. Unless what we've taken for freckles lo, these many long years, are actually nonstop breakouts of flaming pustules. Flaming, tiny, body-wide brown pustules.
Lindsay is all freckles at MrSkin.com.
